Think Before You Type
Anti Cyber-bullying - Interview with Victoria & Lauren Coaxum
by terrence clark
Whether or not you saw their interview on Good Morning Philadelphia September 25 you’ll appreciate this interview.
The internet is like the human heart. It can be good or bad depending on who is in control and of course the motive of its actions. Jesus said out of the same fountain issues both sweet and bitter water---this should not be. Hence the same internet used to order pizza, send greeting cards, research great ideas, stay connected to love ones, produce great works and inspire generations, can also be the same conduit to sow terror, fear, hurt, and hate. I met Lauren and Victoria Coaxum at the birthday and ministry launch of their grandmother Leah Robinson. They looked several years younger than their revealed age. Lauren is 21 and her sister Victoria is 20. Regardless they are two young people on a mission to stop an atrocity that has taunted the lives of many. Their ministry and organization called---Think Before You Type is a rephrasing of the cause---Anti-cyber bullying. Which admittedly, before the interview, I thought was an issue predominately affecting school-age kids. And, they started the campaign some five years ago in 2012 when they fit into that category. It’s true cyberbullying does affect teens, tweens and younger. It’s also happening to an older audience as well. The sisters began their campaign when they saw the negativity exchanged between social media users online and realized the impact it was having on those affected. |
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“People seem to really struggle with it, said Victoria, and we thought it was important to do something to show people that we were standing with them. At the same times, we wanted to raise awareness about the issue and of course to bring our faith into it as well. We believe the internet should be a positive place for people to go. It should also be a place of positive influence for the online community.
So we talked about it and researched the issue. From there, we set up a blog and a YouTube channel establishing our presence online. It took a little bit, but we started to grow. When that started to happen, we started doing things----like speaking in schools and churches. We started doing interviews as well. We interviewed different influential individuals. We branched out.
One of our favorite things to do was to make videos called---Video Dares. They’re really short--- between thirty-seconds and a minute. We dare people to go out and do something positive for the people around them. We suggest a variety of things--- whether it’s getting involved with a specific organization that we think does a really great job in helping people, or something more general like doing something positive for your parents or friends.
Cyber-bullying definitely affects a lot of people and in a lot of different ways. Of course like you said, you generally think of younger people who are on social media that are the victims. Being cyber-bullied can affect a younger individual’s entire family. From there, it’s affecting an older crowd.
Anyone who is on social media is vulnerable to the possibility of cyber-bullying. So our goal is to bring awareness to all people---whether their teachers, parents, students or pastors. We really want people to be aware that anyone can be affected by this issue.”
The social media duo have a great approach I commented. They are not just trying to stop a negative behavior, but replace it. They’re seeking to replace whatever’s driving a person to be involved in cyber-bullying with something positive.
The young ladies weren’t sure of the total reason people become cyberbullies, but they propose it could be several reasons.
“I think one of the reasons, said Victoria, that we see over and over again, is the idea that it feels so easy to be braver, bolder, or more anonymous online. I think people forget that the things that are read online have the same impact as things people say verbally. We really have to talk about the power of words. Words are so powerful. They literally have the power of life or death.
I think people forget that when their online and typing in a comment, or saying something small, it has major impact. I think people forget the impact power of their words. And of course, people have personal issues going on that drive them to wack out and do things they normally wouldn’t do. Like anything else, social media has its positive and negative side.
So we talked about it and researched the issue. From there, we set up a blog and a YouTube channel establishing our presence online. It took a little bit, but we started to grow. When that started to happen, we started doing things----like speaking in schools and churches. We started doing interviews as well. We interviewed different influential individuals. We branched out.
One of our favorite things to do was to make videos called---Video Dares. They’re really short--- between thirty-seconds and a minute. We dare people to go out and do something positive for the people around them. We suggest a variety of things--- whether it’s getting involved with a specific organization that we think does a really great job in helping people, or something more general like doing something positive for your parents or friends.
Cyber-bullying definitely affects a lot of people and in a lot of different ways. Of course like you said, you generally think of younger people who are on social media that are the victims. Being cyber-bullied can affect a younger individual’s entire family. From there, it’s affecting an older crowd.
Anyone who is on social media is vulnerable to the possibility of cyber-bullying. So our goal is to bring awareness to all people---whether their teachers, parents, students or pastors. We really want people to be aware that anyone can be affected by this issue.”
The social media duo have a great approach I commented. They are not just trying to stop a negative behavior, but replace it. They’re seeking to replace whatever’s driving a person to be involved in cyber-bullying with something positive.
The young ladies weren’t sure of the total reason people become cyberbullies, but they propose it could be several reasons.
“I think one of the reasons, said Victoria, that we see over and over again, is the idea that it feels so easy to be braver, bolder, or more anonymous online. I think people forget that the things that are read online have the same impact as things people say verbally. We really have to talk about the power of words. Words are so powerful. They literally have the power of life or death.
I think people forget that when their online and typing in a comment, or saying something small, it has major impact. I think people forget the impact power of their words. And of course, people have personal issues going on that drive them to wack out and do things they normally wouldn’t do. Like anything else, social media has its positive and negative side.
Social media has its place by being able to contact people all over the world. Of course, that sort of plays into it, making it easier for people to add to cyber-bullying. Of course, it’s also has a positive side to it as well, because you can stay in contact with people that you may not have been able to stay in contact with otherwise.”
I posed to the sister team, playing the advocate, if people know that these ill activities are taking place on Facebook, why isn’t the thought just to ignore it or just back away from using it. “Definitely, replied Lauren, if you’re in the moment and something negative is going on, definitely get off of Facebook. Get away from social media. However, like Victoria said, there is a positive side to social media. There’s a lot of reason people won’t step away from it especially teenagers. It’s such a big part of their social life, to begin with. It would be hard for someone to pull away from it completely. |
I remembered one of my favorite movies Akeela and the Bee (Lions Gate Films--2006). The scene where Akeela is in her mentors---Mr. Larabee’s office and they talk about how bigger words are made up of smaller words. They talk about the impact of words and what a single word could do.
As for feedback and successes, they have received for ministry the young ladies share.
“A story we shared recently, we were speaking at a school in South Carolina. There was this little girl who we later learned came from a really rough background. She had a really terrible home life with a lot of negative things going on in her life. She came up to us at the end of the presentation and she told us she wanted to get involved in what we were doing. She wanted to do something positive for the people around her. She said our talks impacted her and made her realize that she could do something positive for her classmates and her peers. It was something amazing for us to see. Somebody who came from this negative background now had the power to do something positive for people.”
Lauren and Victoria’s vision and goals are to help people whether it be one person, ten thousand people, or a million people. They shared, “At the end of the day, all we want to know is that we have been there. We want to be a place people can come too and learn more about cyberbullying and using the internet for good. It’s knowing we helped people have more positive self-esteem. It’s knowing in some way we helped somebody through having an impact on their life and future.
The two sister have another motivation to their vision as well, both are Christians. I asked if they consider their work a ministry or something else.
“I think we would. Still, it depends, because we do a lot with secular audiences as well. It’s definitely our ministry in terms of fundamental fact. We call it that. We call it non-profit because we are non-profit as well. I guess we fall into multiple categories.”
Good response I thought because the general idea of ministry is helping people. Of course, Christian ministries states by the power of God were helping people. This reaches into the secular world also because Christ is our backing. He’s our motivation.
The two cyber champions invited teenager and tween-ager to get involved. It was evident that it were kids especially who are very big out there in the social media universe. The two cited involvement with and supporting their efforts was a way to stay out of the cyberbullying and internet negativity.
“Negative situations can find you, said Lauren. Obviously staying out of the negativity is something you can’t control. We share with people is to stand by those who are getting cyber-bullied. Motivate them not to comment back online. Motivate them to perhaps take some time off the internet. Encourage them to go and talk to a trusted adult about the problem. Be a good friend and to stand by the person being bullied. Definitely, a good thing to do is to pray with that person and pray for that person.
If you run into cyber-bullying, or to see it, definitely don’t beat up a person whose commenting negatively. If you’re angry about something step away or log off of social media.” Victoria concurred.
“Write down what you want to say on paper. Come back to it later when you’re less worked up about it and see if you really would want to put that out into the world. Take a walk just try to stay away from it in those ways.”
Their name is not gimmicky it the mission. It the first step into involvement as a cyber-champion opposed to a cyber-bully. They say social media users should always think before they type. “We really want to throw that message out there. Take a second and just think before you put something out on the internet. Another way, to get involved is to watch our Dares and see if there is something interested to do. See if there’s a way you can help an organization that you love or are interested in. Certainly, you can call us. We’re always accepting ideas for our Dares. On our website, we have a little box in our contact section through which they can send in ideas.”
The sister’s organization can be found on all the social media sites. They are open for ideas and people connections, volunteers, and of course prayers. Their website TBYTmedia.com is loaded with resources about cyberbullying, all of their interviews, and Dares.
To the Voice of One question of ---Who is Jesus Christ in their life?
The girls answered in unison. “He’s my Rock. My Foundation on which my life is built. He’s the Foundation on which TBYT was built. He’s my Friend---my Everything.”
As for feedback and successes, they have received for ministry the young ladies share.
“A story we shared recently, we were speaking at a school in South Carolina. There was this little girl who we later learned came from a really rough background. She had a really terrible home life with a lot of negative things going on in her life. She came up to us at the end of the presentation and she told us she wanted to get involved in what we were doing. She wanted to do something positive for the people around her. She said our talks impacted her and made her realize that she could do something positive for her classmates and her peers. It was something amazing for us to see. Somebody who came from this negative background now had the power to do something positive for people.”
Lauren and Victoria’s vision and goals are to help people whether it be one person, ten thousand people, or a million people. They shared, “At the end of the day, all we want to know is that we have been there. We want to be a place people can come too and learn more about cyberbullying and using the internet for good. It’s knowing we helped people have more positive self-esteem. It’s knowing in some way we helped somebody through having an impact on their life and future.
The two sister have another motivation to their vision as well, both are Christians. I asked if they consider their work a ministry or something else.
“I think we would. Still, it depends, because we do a lot with secular audiences as well. It’s definitely our ministry in terms of fundamental fact. We call it that. We call it non-profit because we are non-profit as well. I guess we fall into multiple categories.”
Good response I thought because the general idea of ministry is helping people. Of course, Christian ministries states by the power of God were helping people. This reaches into the secular world also because Christ is our backing. He’s our motivation.
The two cyber champions invited teenager and tween-ager to get involved. It was evident that it were kids especially who are very big out there in the social media universe. The two cited involvement with and supporting their efforts was a way to stay out of the cyberbullying and internet negativity.
“Negative situations can find you, said Lauren. Obviously staying out of the negativity is something you can’t control. We share with people is to stand by those who are getting cyber-bullied. Motivate them not to comment back online. Motivate them to perhaps take some time off the internet. Encourage them to go and talk to a trusted adult about the problem. Be a good friend and to stand by the person being bullied. Definitely, a good thing to do is to pray with that person and pray for that person.
If you run into cyber-bullying, or to see it, definitely don’t beat up a person whose commenting negatively. If you’re angry about something step away or log off of social media.” Victoria concurred.
“Write down what you want to say on paper. Come back to it later when you’re less worked up about it and see if you really would want to put that out into the world. Take a walk just try to stay away from it in those ways.”
Their name is not gimmicky it the mission. It the first step into involvement as a cyber-champion opposed to a cyber-bully. They say social media users should always think before they type. “We really want to throw that message out there. Take a second and just think before you put something out on the internet. Another way, to get involved is to watch our Dares and see if there is something interested to do. See if there’s a way you can help an organization that you love or are interested in. Certainly, you can call us. We’re always accepting ideas for our Dares. On our website, we have a little box in our contact section through which they can send in ideas.”
The sister’s organization can be found on all the social media sites. They are open for ideas and people connections, volunteers, and of course prayers. Their website TBYTmedia.com is loaded with resources about cyberbullying, all of their interviews, and Dares.
To the Voice of One question of ---Who is Jesus Christ in their life?
The girls answered in unison. “He’s my Rock. My Foundation on which my life is built. He’s the Foundation on which TBYT was built. He’s my Friend---my Everything.”